Article 6. ‘TWAS THE DAY AND NIGHT BEFORE THE BIG BANG: God Was Absolutely Resting, Father Time Was Santa Claus No Cap, Gravity Was Settled for a Long Winter’s Nap and Light Was Intact, so Space Was Empty With No B Holes or Atoms in Sight

Fast-forward to the present 🎁 day and night 

And away to the iPad I flew like a flash

Opened-up a window, and threw up my lunch

When what to my wondering eyes did appear on a YouTube clip 

But THE GRINCH! 

And it was a vision in Technicolor c. 1966 with a re-make in 2000 to boot: 

“How the Grinch Stole Christmas!” 

Ft. the titular star driving a very good dog named Max

Slaving alone with the entire under-world’s weight on his own little back  

While the sunlight shining on the snowmen below 

Caused me to deduce a new fact and say to my cats:

“D’oh! God is like many snowmen all lined-up next to each other in a row!” 

And also I said to myself:

“I bet I could explain what I mean in a bunch of quick steps.

And how cool is that? 

Every sub-atomic particle in the universe has its own control force and gravity force to just whip it and whip it good!” 

Then my imagination went from low gear to high    

And I knew that the Santa Clause in the Laws of Physics 

Was here to save Christmas from the Grinch’s attempt to steal it doggy style.

Sure as dry leaves before the hurricane fly 

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky 

There was a sleigh full of toys and St. Nicholas 

With a small herd of reindeer all cut from the same cloth and determined to protect Max!

Closer-up I could see that Master G was dressed all in baby seal fur, from his head to his foot

And he wore a backpack with a George Foreman Grill box poking out of the top.

Given his years

The beard of his chin should have been as white as the hairs on the crown of my head

But it was an unnatural shade of brown instead.

So, “Maybe it’s Maybelline?” I said

Or alternatively, “Perhaps it’s Just For Men?” 

And I laughed in spite of having a lot to dread from that dyed-in-the-wool chonky old wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Then in the moonlight I watched him B&E into the house 

And rifle through my computer files as quiet as a mouse

Before he finally put a finger inside of his nose

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.

After I lit the Yuletide log in the fireplace and walked into the kitchen

I heard him exclaim:

“NO LIKES FOR YOU, ST. WITCH!”

At the same time I saw St. Nicholas spring to his sleigh, to his team give a whistle

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle

But I thought I heard him announce just before they went out of sight:

“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

If you are a tax accountant or Ebenezer Scrooge then you will probably enjoy the rest of this post. 

Here’s an overview of where this post is heading:  

We’ve got to describe Absolute Rest in detail and choose our vocabulary wisely to “tell the story” about THE EXPERIENCE of Absolute Rest, which is like explaining the “WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHY and HOW” of Absolute Rest.

And we’re going to “tell the story” STEP-BY-STEP, sort of like the instructions for filling-out tax forms do, to help us pull-together different pieces of information in specific ways to answer specific questions about—in other words, to DOCUMENT—what has been EXPERIENCED in fact (by whom and in what quantity and where and when and why) and also to help us identify, understand and apply THE APPLICABLE LAWS to figure-out how to RESPOND to specific EXPERIENCES that we have DOCUMENTED. 

Even if we threw the Tax Law in the toilet and we have no clue how our behavior IRL matches-up with what the Tax Law requires of us, the IRS did not cease to exist, and I’m sure that the IRS is not in the “forgiveness” business if the excuse for Tax Law violations is: “TLDR Tax Law! Why are you sweating the small stuff? It must be nice! I don’t have TIME for this detailed shite, I’ve got to MAKE THE DONUTS!” 

There has to be a reckoning. And if we owe a tax reckoning, how much more do we owe God?!

ANA PASCAL: [Donought Baker] I won’t be paying…no matter how big the percent.

HAROLD CRICK: [IRS Agent] No, I know. But the percent determines how big your cell is.

So hang-on, because once we’ve gotten our DOCUMENTATION in order, we can quickly summarize it in an easy-peasy-to-read FORCE-INCOME/FORCE-EXPENDITURE FORMAT, then “the big picture” of God experiencing ZERO NET FORCE—Absolute Rest—will *snap* into focus and make perfect sense.

And even more important, we will be able to APPLY the same FORCE-INCOME/FORCE-EXPENDITURE NET-FORCE-FINDING FORMAT to future analysis projects so that we can use the same vocabulary and process to explain every event we are curious about, from the Big Bang to atom creation to atomic bonding to moving objects to orbiting (galaxy formation) to electromagnetic interactions! 

But I feel like Harold Crick might have already said all of this in the movie “Stranger Than Fiction.”

ANA PASCAL: [Donought Baker] Get bent, tax man!

PROFESSOR JULES HILBERT: [keeps a recipe book entitled “Healthy Desserts” on his bookshelf] Dramatic irony. It’ll f*ck you every time.

Step 1. RECALL Article 1, Article 2, Article 3, Article 4 and Article 5. 

Step 2. RECALL (see Article 3, Part Two of the Two-Part Relativity Thought Experiment) that a higher-dimension part of God can act—meaning apply a force—upon a lower-dimension part of God, but not vice-versa.

OK that’s enough steps for now, let’s go-ahead and hit “THE HIGHLIGHT REEL” here:

In THE HIGHLIGHT REEL, we’re taking a sneak-peek at some of the most interesting new information we’ll deduce as we tell the “how-to story” of Absolute Rest step-by-step, then after we’ve seen a few of the “coming attractions,” we’ll put our noses back to the grindstone and tackle every step in-turn.

***************************

1/10/25 The remainder of this article is UNDER CONSTRUCTION

****************************